A TRIP TO THE SKIN DOCTOR
If you’re under 40, you can skip this story altogether. If you’re over 40: read on…
As a youngster, I had beautiful skin. Clear, porcelain-like and unmarked by acne or anything else. My five siblings, however, struggled with the horrors of acne. I felt very lucky. Yeah, I even gloated a bit now and then.
But eventually, Father Time and lack of hormones caught up to me: at around age 45 if I recall. Then the horror started. First it was a tiny spot of skin cancer.
Then cysts, the age spots, the moles, the pimples, the random “goat hairs”, the WARTS, skin tags – and all on my face. I wasn’t just alarmed: I was freaked out.
Thus began the twice a year visits to the dermatologist (whose kids were helped through college by my very frequent donations.)
“Well, Good morning, Mrs. White,” she bounced breezily into the exam room. “How’s fishing? Wearing your sunscreen, I hope.”
Dr. Roman is a no-nonsense, straightforward skin wiz with a knack for sarcasm and a quick wit. She’s also an expert in her field for skin cancer and has removed a small piece of it for me in the past.
I nodded yes as the doctor began her pore by pore exam of my sorry countenance.
“What’s wrong with my skin?”
“Welll, nothing unusual, normal old age stuff, ya know? But no signs of skin cancer re-occurrence” she announced.
“Then why does my face look like somebody walked on it with cleats?”
She looked at me like I was a 5 year old.
“Dear, you’ve got some post-menopausal acne with age-associated problems. Nothing a good laser or chemical peel won’t solve.”
“Laser? Chemicals? Sounds painful.” I muttered.
“No, not that painful, but pricey and not covered by insurance.”
“Okay, so what’s this going to cost?”
“Barring any complications, around $2000 give or take. But there’s some good news, too.”
“There is? Tell me!” I grew a tad excited.
“You don’t have even a sign of turkey neck. Your neck skin is tight and nearly flawless. You’re quite lucky; it’s usually one of the first things that happens to older gals, along with bingo flaps. So congrats on that.”
“Well, thanks Doc.”
I felt like I had just been thrown a left-handed compliment, fastball style.
With that Dr. Frankenstein went on to her next victim.
I couldn’t wait to talk this over with my hubby. As soon as I got in my car, I called him.
“Honey, I don’t have Turkey Neck!” I yelled into the phone when he answered.
“What? What are you talking about?” he sounded puzzled.
“I have no signs of skin cancer, and NO TURKEY NECK. And it’s only going to cost about $2000 dollars for the work I need. Isn’t that great news?”
“Um, sure, but I think you should go back to wearing the brown paper sack over your head when you leave the house,” he said with a snicker in his voice. ”You can buy a lot of brown bags for two grand.”
I’m just going to ignore his teasing, because I have NO turkey neck!
IN MY HUMBLE OPINION
Reflections on daily life
By Sherry White
So, my uncle died in July. It wasn’t a huge shock to anyone, he was 78 years old. I think even he knew it was coming.
What WAS shocking though, was the way I found out. From my sister. Through a phone call that was the result of a TEXT MESSAGE. Yeah, a text from our aunt who was with him in another city when he passed. A damn text message. I couldn’t believe it!
What the hell? Was he NOT worth a phone call? It still bothers me. I mean, really? Where’s the respect? Where’s the consideration? Where’s the ETIQUETTE??
Or…am I just too damn “old school”.
I have a Windows cell phone. I also have a desktop PC and a laptop. I’ve been online since 1999. Tech savvy—nah but for my age, I think I do pretty good.
BUT, the spoken word in a time of grief seems much more appropriate to me.
My kids are big on texting. They do it all day long. They send me texts more than they call me. Am I offended by this? Yeah, a little. I mean, heck, I’m your MOTHER and someday you’ll WISH you could hear my voice again. I know I miss my mom and her voice. I don’t mind an occasional text saying “I’m on the way” or “Do you have time to chat?” but beyond that, I would like a phone call.
Particularly annoying is a text from ANYONE that says “call me”. DUH, why don’t you just DIAL MY FREAKING NUMBER if you want to talk?!?! Is it because you’re afraid you’ll call at a bad time? I’m not that unaccommodating! If it’s a bad time, I’m gonna tell you so!
Don’t get me wrong: I’m in love with digital communication when appropriate.
I have a Facebook account, a Twitter account and the old My Space page. I have at least six email accounts for different purposes. I use to sell on Ebay and still have an account. I play games online, I post to Facebook, I do a lot of banking and shopping online too. I even have a blog on Word Press. I’m not AFRAID of technology, I embrace it most of the time.
But I’m concerned that communication will soon be a lost art. If 80 year old ladies are texting instead of making that simple phone call, what’s next?
I shudder at the thought.